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Mother’s Day Sunday

Mother’s Day was a beautiful day. I woke up with anticipation. It was also Sunday, my favorite day of the week. I knew I was gonna hear a word and I knew I was gonna have a good day. Kids were well behaved and ready to go. I was all dolled up in a brand new dress. The week before had been one out of dreamland. Flowers being delivered, cards with words written for me, a brand new back porch finished and painted, evening dinners, warm hugs, bowling and a puppy and another chapter beginning for me yet again.

The sermon was taken from John 19: 25-27:

²⁵ Now there stood by the cross of Jesus His mother, and His mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary Magdalene. ²⁶ When Jesus therefore saw His mother, and the disciple whom He loved standing by, He said to His mother, “Woman, behold your son!” ²⁷ Then He said to the disciple, “Behold your mother!” And from that hour that disciple took her to his own home.

The name of the sermon was Taking Care of Momma. Here we see Jesus’ body nailed to a cross and several of those who loved him were standing right there next tot he cross. He looks down and tells his mother to look at her son, John  (the disciple whom He loved) and Jesus told John to take his mother to his house and take care of her. I suspect because he knew that she was gonna need some taking care of, she needed rest and some down time.

I have read and seen and heard this particular passage about Jesus’ mother, Mary, however, on Sunday I had a reaction. I felt the power of the very fact that Mary. Jesus’ mother who had birthed him now watched him die. I reminds me as I type of the scene in Steel Magnolia’s where Julia Roberts is dying and her mother, Shirley MacLaine is sitting at the side of her bed watching her die. They look at each other and each knows that the end is near. Julia asks her to take care of her husband and her kids, says goodbye to her children and then after she has taken care of business – Julia dies. Shirley never leaves her side in life and in death she never left it. This mother stayed the course. Jesus’ mother, Mary, stayed the course. She birthed her son, she raised him and she walked with him through every bad and good time he ever had in his life; she was there until the end.

Being a mother is the hardest job that you will ever love. It is also the job that can determine not only your destiny in life, but the lives of so many more people – your  children and their children and their children to come – are affected. As a mother, a good mother, you stand with your kids through thick and thin. I believe the whole idea of marriage in sickness and in health should be a phrase that all mothers must speak before they take the child out of the hospital or the delivery place. Being a mother is through thick and thin. No matter what your child has or has not done as mother you are to stick and stay. Your job is to make sure that your child can make it through his or her life. And if he/she cannot then it is our job to be as supportive as possible; to celebrate the minor and the major triumphs and to hope and pray that during thes times of indecision and poor choices that our children make – that in the end they will get it and come out on top or at least pretty close. A mother endures pain that children experience. A mother who retires at 55 is a good mother.

 

 

Good Day

  My daughter got a 28/35 on her state report for 5th grade. She was so proud of herself. My middle son had a soccer game this evening and they won 7 to 1. My oldest son had a track meet today and he was able to qualify for the Sectionals in the long jump, the triple jump and the team qualified in the 4  x 100. I came home and my back porch was finished and painted, I received a beautiful card, a gift card and a set of pots and pans and all I could do was squeal and jump around. My cup runneth over.  In the mail I received 2 photo’s of my niece and nephew that I have not seen since they were small children. They are now 19 and 17. One is in college and one is graduating high school. One each from my 2 sisters-in-laws. We have not spoken in over 10 years and yet we have remained in contact.  I divorced their husbands brothers years ago and when that happened his family divorced me and my children. My sisters-in-laws each at separate times have expressed the need for us to get together. I agree.  It is a matter of when. With a total of 5 children between us it will be difficult; however I think it would be well worth it.

As women we are the generally the keepers of the family traditions and the family get togethers. Without us how would there ever be  a family reunion or a Thanksgiving Dinner with all the fixin’s? On this almost mothers day weekend I am reminded that a woman that has her stuff together is an amazing being to watch. As women we are charged and challenged to teach our children and often times our spouses how to make the connections that keep the surprises in our lives. We have to know that in the end all things really will work out. Perhaps now is the time to plan a family get together with the other side of my children’s family. I remember when I was growing up,  I only spent time with my father’s family. I know just about every single one of them. My mothers family I know some by name; I do not know every single one of them. The reason is that my mother didn’t push it and my father didn’t seem to care. The apple doesn’t fall far becaue I have done the same thing as my parens. I have not pushed it and their father doesn’t care.

I want my children to know their other-side of the family people and as such this is just one more thing that I would like to see accomplished before I retire at 55.

Samaritan Woman

  I woke up this morning excited as usual because as you know Sunday is my favorite today.  And today I had so many words speak to me that I know a change is coming.  I set my alarm on Saturday evenings to wake up at 6:30 a.m. to allow me time to hit the snooze button about 4 times and then finally at about 6:55 a.m., I sit straight up and begin the stumbly, half awake/eyes barely open walking and holding on to the rails of the staircase as I walk slowly down guided by the aroma of coffee.  I go into the kitchen pour my coffee, put in a teaspoon of sugar and then take that first sip – yeeeaass – and then I amble back up the stairs a little more alert and sit down on the edge of my bed with the hot coffee cup in my left hand and the remote control in my right. I turn on the t.v. and hear the voice of Charles Stanley. http://www.intouch.org/. He was talking about the woman at the well.  This is the second time that one of my favorite speakers has spoken about this woman at the well, the Samaritan woman. The other speaker that spoke about this woman was TD Jakes. http://www.tdjakes.org/.  I believe I finally figured why some women settle in relationships it is the talk that we talk about ourselves in our minds that comes out in our speech.  It has been proven by some high-falutin big time scientific types who enjoy the small stuff that makes us all tick, that we believe what we hear about ourselves from our own mouths rather than what people/the world has to say. There is a scripture that mentions we are hung by the tongue and I do believe that.  This is the principle of the book The Secret and it is the principle of the New Testament of the Bible.  What we say we become, what we speak we are.

So, back to the woman at the well.  She is a woman who has had 4 husbands and now is single again and dating a 5th guy. When she encounters this man sitting at the well, he asks her, a Samaritan woman, for some water and then asks her a question about her husband. She is surprised that he asks her for the water (and that is another aha moment that I am not going to deal with right now) and about her husband. She replied that she does not have a husband. Again, this woman has been married 4 times and now she has decided to just shack up with number 5. …in her mind she came to the conclusion that BECAUSE every man that she loved and gave her all to left that there must be something wrong with her.  Soooo what she does is internalize this and then decides well I am not going to give myself to any man in marriage, I am going to not expect anything and choose a man to just get by – settle.  Me? Oh my…

Here comes my aha moment; follow me ya’ll… One of the things that Charles Stanley explained this morning was that back in those days the man did not need to have a reason to leave the relationship, it could be anything from how the husband didn’t like what she cooked for dinner to what he wants his wife to do sexually that she doesn’t want to do, to something that she knows is immoral and she will not do. Now this woman who in her eyes has been rejected realizes that she no longer wants to be rejected and play the “whose gonna call who first” game, so she settles and allows this last man to live with her. Stanley said that no amount of apologies can make up for the rejection that this woman has felt on many an occasions by man after man.  Every time they left for their reasons this Samaritan woman’s heart was broken. Then he said that the man at the well said that what he had to offer was the living water and that living water would and could provide all that she needs. He told her of her past and she knew then that it wasn’t that she was wrong what it is, is that she needed to realize that the men she chose had their reasons that really had nothing to do with who she is not.  If I continue to talk the negative deep down inside kinda’ quiet talk to myself that is not good for me then what makes me think good will come. This Samaritan woman came away from this encounter with a new found belief that indeed God lives in her and she goes out to tell all of the men she saw as she came back in town. She had a new found inner glow and even though they could see the same body walking they could feel something different about her. These men believed and then believed even more when they encountered this man, Jesus for themselves.  Stanley says she did not speak to the women only to the men. Women have a tendency to be more critical of each other and less forgiving and that is another blog entirely; and often times until another woman can really see a change in actions they find it hard to embrace the change. I believe that Ms. Samaritan woman continues in her joy and soon she is at the point where she is so full of His love that his love isn’t as important as she thought it was.  It would be nice; however it will not define her. Her passion is and always will be God and the 3 children that he has entrusted in her care. She/I plan to come to my life with this renewed vigor for who I am and embrace the living water that His Word promises.

 

Woman Preacher

Women’s Sunday was fabulous. When she speaks her words go through me.  The first time I heard her speak, I knew that this woman was indeed a woman of God. She has gone through the fire and has come out victorious and on the other side of fabulous. Her message came from the Proverbs 31 woman. A bad in a good way woman, a strong woman, a woman who knows her purpose and lives her passion. This is the ideal that we should ascribe to. We are all a work in process and even though we can’t do it all we can do something. We have to allow Him to transform us and to teach us when to speak and when not to speak and how to speak. We need to always flavor our words with kindness. Even when you have to chastise, correct or clarify another; we must flavor it with kindness. People, in particular, a woman-sistah, needs to feel that you get her. That you understand her struggle, that you are not condemning in your assessment of the situation – that you care. A woman on the verge of being 31 has to wear the proper armor. That armor allows us to be protected in every situation. We need to stay in the flow of his blessings by wearing that which protects us. That protection is His word.

The other night at Bible Study, I was taught that a spiritual gift and  a talent are two separate things. The spiritual gift is what God gives you and when that gift is working in you, you can’t help but to do the thing. If you do not do it, it will always be with you; that thing you wished you shoulda’ done at 15, at 27, at 40, at 53, at 55, at 60 will stay with you forever, UNTIL you do it. It will nag at you and it will always hover just out of your reach. Until you try it.  The time to try anything is when you feel this overwhelming inner urge that says ‘just do it’.  Our push can come from anywhere, if we remain constant in our commitment to staying in the flow of his blessings we will know what to do.  The problem arises when we fill up our lives with so much “stuff” that is distracting, that we are unable to hear that still small voice that is inside of us. The Proverbs 31 woman is a woman who is organized, who is kind, who is determined and who is wise. Wisdom comes through the doing of a thing. Once that thing is done, we understand aha if  I’da only done it this way, or not done it that way and even though it turned out all right, it took a much longer time than it should. The next time I will know better. If you know better, you can do better.

After her words of correction were spoken I had an Oprah aha moment and I didn’t feel put down or belittled. I felt that she heard me and she saw me, and in love and with words that I could understand she guided my mind to the place where I shook my head and said ‘that was good.’

 

 

Don’t Miss The Signs

April 15th was a Sunday. My favorite day of the week. The day I get fed and the day I am able to rest in His word and in the company of those who seek Him. I woke this day with anticipation. It was not only regular church service there was a women’s program following in the afternoon and I was geeked up at 7 a.m. in the morning. Just so looking forward to hearing a message that would prick my heart. I did. As I arrived at the front door to the church it opened and he was there. Big smile, warm hug, one hand around my waist and the other hand on a card. He asked me if I would go to lunch with him. I smiled and said yes. He gave me the card and we both smiled and went into service. A man who already goes to church.

The preacher that spoke that morning brought his message from Mark 8:10-13

^#10 immediately got into the boat with His disciples, and came to the region of Dalmanutha.

The Pharisees Seek a Sign

¹¹ Then the Pharisees came out and began to dispute with Him, seeking from Him a sign from heaven, testing Him. ¹² But He sighed deeply in His spirit, and said, “Why does this generation seek a sign? Assuredly, I say to you, no sign shall be given to this generation.”

Beware of the Leaven of the Pharisees and Herod

¹³ And He left them, and getting into the boat again, departed to the other side.”

This chapter is focusing on the loaves and fishes. Right before verse 20 we have the disciples handing out bread and fish to over 5000 men and women and children. A little  boys lunch. 7 loaves and small fish. Jesus broke the bread, handed it to his apostles and told them to feed the people – all of them. After they did this and ate and had 7 baskets left over they left. They grew tired of not getting what they wanted. Where was their miracle? Jesus became frustrated; after all, they had been walking with Jesus for years and had seen plenty of miracls – tstill they ask for their miracle. When are they gonna get outta here. What about they….They are tired of walking in the desert, they are hungry, their feet hurt, their back is sore – one excuse after another.

The truth is that their miracle was already in the doing. We just have to stay the course. Pay attention to whether you are to yield or to go straight ahead, take the time to watch and listen and read the signs that you are given. And understand some of the best presents are surprises.  And when Jesus said what he said, he stopped talking. I am guilty of talking to much. I am corrected.  Life is a constant learning experience and if we are obedient He guides us in the path where we should go.

As he preached I looked across the pew, there he was and there I was. Me checking him out this time and realizing that there is no time like the present to get in the water. This time I am following the signs and right now I can say WooHoo!!

PRAISE GOD!!

Kidnapped Boy Nayati Moodliar Found Alive In

Missing Boy – Where is he?

Sunday’s Shoes

I heard a word on yesterday that has stuck with me all day. It was brought by 2 different women. One small in height and the other tall in height. One whose voice shakes with the internal voice of a loud strength and the other whose voice rolled with the internal voice exemplified in a  quiet riot. She said to wear your own shoes, the ones that fit you. She said be on the journey to becoming the Proverbs 31 woman. Each said the same thing to me in different voice. As I wrote down each word I found myself sitting up in the pew, pen in hand, the sounds of my pinky finger moving along the page, audibly speaking thank you Lord and shaking my head with down turned mouth and crinkled brow - I hear them and I agree. The congregation for this evening service heard the message from the morning service which was to not miss the signs.  The sign for me that morning is that one never knows in what form and in whom God is going to send your blessing and in whatever manner it is expressed, our spirit must be able to discern that it has arrived.  If and I say if, if, if we miss that blessing for that time, we have to wait yet again for it to come ’round again. Some people get that chance and some do not. I want to get what Spirit has for me the first time because it just might be the last time. We never know when we will receive another chance at getting our Sunday shoes on that fit us so that we can walk into the glory that He has promised me.

I say again that sitting amongst believers in the morning and then in the evening is a beautiful thing. It is an experience that once had it is not forgotten and it is like a good piece of Hershey’s dark chocolate mini’s. Once you peel the wrapper and then the foil that keeps the chocolate fresh, you bite or you inhale the entire mini chocolate savoring each flavor as it passes down your tongue and into its place of rest. If you are like me you just can’t get enough. I can’t get enough. My Lord and My God.

Sunday is my day and the day where once we have our shoes that fit on, every day really is a good day.

Easter Sunday

Sunday is my most favorite day of the week. I go and relax and I go and get filled. This Sunday proved to be a good one. However before I even got to service I had to manage my 3 bundles of joy. The boys were tired and sleepy. They stayed up until the cows came home that Saturday night playing their PS 3 games. They were unable to find the clothes that I told them to wear and then when they found them the illusive steamer to steam their clothes was something they just couldn’t find. The clothes were wrinkly, they were moving way too slow and irritating me to no end. The little girl that I had to have was perky. She decided that the outfit we had picked out for church was ugly. She refused to put it on and when I went to look in her room to see if she was dressed there she sat with panties and bra; defiantly looking at me daring me to do something. I did. I yelled, I stomped, I screamed,  I cursed, she was unmoved and unconcerned. I closed the door, I talked out loud to no one and then proceeded to tell all 3 of them how disappointed I was in them, how tired I am of them, how irritated they make me, how ungrateful they are – I mean I totally acted a fool.  But alas, I was not finished yet. I went back into the room and proceeded to ask her one more time to get dressed and she stared at me and said I don’tike the clothes. I said (trying to remain calm – change my tactics – ha!)well what do you want to wear and she said I don’t know. Well my friends, I said to her I have had enough, get dressed. She said nothing. I popped her on her legs several times, she cried and then I closed the door. A few minutes later I went back into the room and she was getting dressed.

I retreated to my room. I cried, I was tired, they made me tired. I prayed. When we all finally got into the van there was silence. We arrived late to church and I was none too happy. The minute I got into the sanctuary I exhaled. I thanked the Lord and found our seat in the pews.  As the service proceeded I became calm, they did too.  I reached over and touched each one of them. It was gonna be a good one. Being a parent and being children of a single parent is not easy for either of us. They have to adjust to me and I have to adjust to them.

The sermon was of course about the resurrection of Our Lord and Savior. In Luke 24:1-8 it reads:

¹ On the first day of the week, very early in the morning, the women took the spices they had prepared and went to the tomb. ² They found the stone rolled away from the tomb, ³ but when they entered, they did not find the body of the Lord Jesus. ⁴ While they were wondering about this, suddenly two men in clothes that gleamed like lightning stood beside them. ⁵ In their fright the women bowed down with their faces to the ground, but the men said to them, “Why do you look for the living among the dead? ⁶ He is not here; he has risen! Remember how he told you, while he was still with you in Galilee: ⁷ ‘The Son of Man must be delivered over to the hands of sinners, be crucified and on the third day be raised again.’ ” ⁸ Then they remembered his words.

The pastor said that the stone was not rolled away not because He was gone but so that we could get in.  I was like oh my, you are so right. What would He need to roll the stone away for, if he could rise from the dead he could certainly get outta there without a problem? He rolled the stone away so that those coming could see that something was different. The tomb was open and all we had to do was walk in. Once in, the amazement of the emptiness of the tomb reminds us that when Jesus is gone from us it is a lonely thing. He got up and left so that we could walk in and see that He got up. In his tomb we find life.

I needed to know that even when I act a fool, I can still get in.

Passion/Purpose

I was watching TD Jakes on Oprah’s LifeClass - The Tour this past Monday night. I recorded it because I knew I was gonna hear some stuff that I needed to hear over and over again. TD Jakes inspires me to think on the goodness of God. When I hear the man speak, his voice electrifies. He is smart and he is grounded. So, he says that what drives you is your life’s passion. The thing that you would do if no one paid you is your passion.  Once you find your passion, you will find your purpose. And once you find your purpose you will never have to chase after your provision again. Can I get a what, what??  To me this was powerful. He explained that your provision is money or whatever it is that sustains you from day to day. Once you are actively living in your passion, you won’t have to worry about chasing the money, the money will chase you. Now, this doesn’t mean you will become a millionaire, it means that your needs will be taken care of and if you happen to become a millionaire that is gravy. He said that life is like a gymnasium. When you go and work out you can go from one activity to another – lifting weights, running on the treadmill, swimming, etc. and each one of those activities teaches you that you can do them.  You gain a modicum of self respect and you know that once you can do it, no one can tell you otherwise. You experience a sense of confidence that sustains, your self-esteem becomes more esteemed (i know i know, real bad but i think it is kinda’s funny) and can’t nobody (ok yep bad grammar but you understand right?) tell you otherwise.

Now listen to what he says about the gymnasium. You ready? He stated “Self respect stops you from being at the mercy of other people to validate you.” Oh My God – now that is powerful!!  No one can take it away from you. No matter what someone may say about you, no matter who talks about you, who lies on you, who leaves you, who disrespects you – you will know that it does not diminish the fabulous person that you are because your respect of self has increased. As you go through life you have got to try things that are a little uncomfortable or you will never grow.  Often times the uncomfortable feelings will propel you into your destination. The pain will lead you into your purpose. Which leads you into your destiny.

He then talked about feelings. He said that the often times we may not feel like doing a thing; we should do it until the feelings come. He said there have many times he has not felt like being a parent. He says that when his children were little there were so many times when he was flat out tired or they had done something that made him angry and yet that did not stop him from doing the things that they needed him to do. He parented until the feelings of parenting came and this often times doesn’r really take as long as we think.  He added that in relationships the same thing stands. We don’t feel like being a certain way because we don’t feel like being loving. The partner asks us for something and because we don’t feel like doing it we don’t.   My thought is that if we would spend more time responding positively to our significant then the feelings that we don’t have right now would come.  If in fact we are sincere about the relationship.  He said that love will leap over excuses to get things done.  Fake it until you make it. Do it until the feelings come. Love on purpose. Decide and follow through. Be an example of the possibility and not an example of a dream not fulfilled.

If you can’t tell already, I am a fan of TD Jakes. I don’t know anything about his personal life, his relationship with his children or his wife. What I know is what I hear in terms of his sermons. I am sure he has skeletons in his closet, I do too. However, what I know more is that when he speaks his words are like an arrow propelled into the direction of the target. That target is my soul. He touches it each and every time. He reminds me that all things really are possible if you but believe and trust in the Lord to continue to send his Holy Spirit to walk with you. He does and I will.

 

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